But Mr. Prime Minister, Do You Deny Smoking Crack?
Sometimes I wish the media would be a little more daring than it is with its questions to politicians, don’t you? I mean, what does it have to lose by using one of its five allotted questions to ask Stephen Harper about what he does on those fishing trips he takes with Rob Ford every summer.
We know the answer to the other four questions.
Obviously. Clearly. Clearly. Obviously.
C’mon, what the hell else would Stephen Harper, who hates the environment – and rightly so, he’s got asthma as he reminds us every ten minutes, the environment’s trying to kill him – be doing out in the middle of a lake with Rob Ford if he’s NOT smoking crack?
Eh? Don’t make me come down there!
And come to think of it, how come we never see Stephen Harper with a puffer if he’s got so much asthma?
Not to mention, isn’t pot a treatment for it? And if not, why not? Even if it doesn’t cure the wheezing, it will take the rest of our minds off it.
But cripes, speaking of pot – shit or get off it! – who was jonesying more than Stephen Harper for Rob Ford to be elected mayor of Toronto?
Nobody, that’s who. So who cares if Stephen Harper claims to have never smoked pot because he has asthma. Stephen Harper claims to have not done lots of things that have turned out to be not true – and not because of his asthma, either.
Seriously, are we ALL supposed to pretend to believe that Stephen Harper knew nothing about $90,000 in hush money (or whatever we’re not supposed to call a gift to a sitting Senator facing an unexpected audit of his Conservative Party fundraising travel expense trail) being gifted by his own office to a sitting Senator facing an unexpected audit of his Conservative Party fundraising travel expense trail.
And show us the cheque, dammit!
And get back to work!
No, media, I want to hear Stephen Harper deny that he smokes crack just like Rob Ford denied that he smokes crack and then I want the two of them hooked up to a lie detector along with everyone Stephen Harper has ever supported for political office or appointed to a political position – ever!
But I can say that because I had a colleague once upon a time who not only smoked pot with one of Stephen Harper’s political acolytes – after work hours, of course – she did it in the stairwell of a federal government office building.
The pot was apparently primo kickass shit, too, and she was majorly disoriented heading back to her office in a different federal government office building to finish up on a rush job for the Minister, too.
But not to worry, sister and brother Canadians, she had a taxi chit.
Seriously, if most of the Blogging Tories and staff of the Conservative Party of Canada aren’t smoking pot right now I’ll eat my hemp hat.
I don’t really have a hemp hat. A hemp hat would cost too much money for middle-aged middle-class unemployed me, thanks to stupidly partisan and ideologically-driven interference in our economy by politicians like ol’ Flat-top Daddy-o Stephen Harper.
Ferchrissakes, his government’s deregulation policies have led to the deaths of at least 47 Canadians – that we know about – this summer alone – and yet he’s ramped up the red tape (Conservaglish for “regulation”) to further criminalization marijuana use and possession even while his own government is growing it for distribution to Canadians lucky enough to score prescriptions.
Seriously, who do you think benefits more from Stephen Harper’s War on Marijuana? Hell’s Angels, Satan’s Choice, or the Ford Family?
But it’s annoying how giddy everyone gets over pot, isn’t it, as if millions of Canadians haven’t smoked it at one time or another. The cheetos jokes make the rounds, over and over and over. Har, har, let’s waste another billion tax dollars on marijuana prohibition so Blogging Tories can titter and twitter like cartoon schoolgirls.
But enough of those sophomoric twits.
Oh dear, I just noticed the root of Twitter is twit and I’m not even stoned, I swear on the stack of Harper Holey Bibbles I keep by my blogging machine.
I wanted to quit drinking so I went to AA and I continue to go to AA because it works. Pot isn’t problematic for me, like drinking is, but I’m not smoking it just the same. I was tailor made for sobriety, as luck would have it, and am happy to have re-discovered it. I enjoy clean living. And I shouldn’t say pot isn’t problematic for me, either, because it did increase my fat/sugar/salt intake considerably, and I’m naturally a light eater.
And I share the concern a lot of healthcare professionals have about the effect of pot on developing brains, particularly those of young men who don’t smoke pot so much as hoover it between toofers.
That’s slang for a 24 bottle case of beer, for my teetotaler reader(s).
But none of that changes the fact that alcohol is legal, addictive, and kills and injures more Canadians than all of the illegal, non-addictive marijuana in the world combined – excepting the casualties of the stupidly partisan and ideologically-driven War on Marijuana by the likes of Stephen Harper.
You know, given the deadly toll resulting from Stephen Harper’s political decision to deregulate industry to benefit shareholder profits at the cost of the lives of our sister and brother Canadians in Lac Megantic, he’s got one helluva nerve snarking about a politician (of all humanoids) stepping up to do the right thing and regulate marijuana for legal sale.
P.S. Yes, you’ve been in favour of the decriminalization of marijuana for years, NDP. So, time to get with the now and move on to legalization, please.