Knock, Knock
Who's there?
Why, it's your local gas distribution company door-to-door salesthugs.
Yes, indeed, good citizens of Ontario. Time to barricade yourselves behind closed doors lest one of those fly-by-night gas distributors sign you up for a lifetime of overpriced delivery service.
Didn't sign anything but showed 'em your gas bill?
Prepare to be signed up for a lifetime of overpriced gas delivery service.
Didn't sign anything and didn't even show 'em your gas bill?
Prepare to be signed up for a lifetime of overpriced gas delivery service.
Sigh. Remember before Mike Harris became Premier and he and his backroom boys (come on down Ritchie Rich Tory) broke everything up and sold off the best parts of everything to their buds and then stuck unwitting taxpayers with the big clunky leftovers their buddies didn't want?
Well, those days are over, Stupid Voters. We're in gas distribution de-regulation days now and it's a free-for-all for hucksters and shysters from all over - consumer beware. In fact, be so ware you don't even sneak a peak out the window for fear you'll sign your life savings away to the guy at the door by blinking. Because if he looks like a cross between an AWOL circus carny and a Hell's Angel on parole and he's with two other guys who look like they left their balaclavas behind in the car to scare the shit out of you harder, faster - you've got gas distribution company representatives on your property.
I know, I know. But Sooey - they can't sign you up for a service you haven't agreed to contract.
Oh. But that's where you'd be wrong, Dear Consuming Reader. They can do whatever they want. Sort of like Rogers and its billing/service practices except at least with Rogers you know you're with Rogers because you get your mailbox stuffed with its junk mail every day imploring you to buy MORE! MORE! MORE! of its shitty crappy unreliable services and products, so it can jack up the price on ever more of its shitty crappy unreliable services and product - later.
Ah... almost monopolies...
But with gas distribution companies, you're at the mercy of many factors - none of them legitimate and all of them fraudulent. Don't believe me? Pick a name of any gas distribution company, any one, and check out the registered complaints against it (and that's just complaints by people who know they've been signed up, or find out they've been signed up when their gas bill suddenly skyrockets) and you'll note one common denominator - they're all pointing out that these gas distribution companies are the business equivalent of pickpockets - albeit the type of pickpockets who track you down after they've ripped you off and charge you triple for the privilege.
Nevertheless, and in spite of all of the above, in post Mike Harris Ontario, if a gas distribution company stays in the game long enough, weathers the class action lawsuits, etc., you can end up watching feel good 50s style commericals on television featuring those same pickpockets - i.e. one "Indirect #*&%!" company. (The name has been altered to protect the writer from lawsuits. These boys have friends in high political places and play legal hardball with citizens who complain too much. Or at all, actually.)
Anyway, take a gander over any one of these complaints sites and you'll notice that people are complaining about having been switched over from their usual provider to a new provider without ever having signed anything. How can that happen? Well, apparently, they can come to your door, demand to see your gas bill (or... well... not even ask - if you know what I mean) and then call you back to offer you the opportunity to sign up for their services. Answering the phone, "Hello?" might be all they need by way of a verbal commitment. Answering the phone, "Hello?" may mean that you've agreed to sign up to receive their services. It may not. They may have signed you up already. Without having even knocked on your door, perhaps. Who knows? Maybe some gas distribution company has decided to sign you up for its services in the time it took me to write this blog entry.
No matter. What matters is that once you find out it's signed you up, it will cost you hundreds of dollars to break your contract. That's right. You will have to pay to get out of a contract you were not aware you had signed on to - mostly because you didn't.
How did all this happen? I have no idea. I just live here and pay taxes. Apparently, the Government of Ontario just lives here and does sweet fuck all.
My advice? Get the addresses of these "companies" and show up with a clipboard and when they answer the door say, "Great. You've answered the door and in so doing have just agreed to pay all my energy bills for the rest of my life."
Just be careful they don't shoot you in the back when you turn to leave.
That's how business is done in Ontario these days.
