Public Service Announcement
Literally.
If you are studying French because you have a deep and abiding love and respect for the French language, or because you live in Ottawa, allow me to share some recently acquired inside knowledge with you.
Updates to follow as I encounter them.
There are entire verb tenses which exist only if you are performing, will perform, have performed, performed regularly, would have performed if certain conditions were being met simultaneously to the time the action was to be performed, are performing depending on your mood, opinion, or feeling at the time of the performing of the action - in French.
Do not try to translate French back to English, Dear Reader, or your brain cells will start snapping apart and instead of being twice as smart and bilingual, you will be half as stupid and bipolar. Accept that French people do things at times and in moods English people don't have the time or mood for because we are too busy running the world.
Also, bear in mind, ALWAYS, that objects are either ladies or gentlemen and there's no reason for it and French people will understand you if you mix up the genders and quantities of direct objects being modified by the verb IF such objects are in a certain order in the sentence and require such modifications BUT you must assign the object either a male or female, singular or plural designation - even if you don't know what it is - OR the French person will just stare at you uncomprehendingly until you switch to English.
