Sooey Says

There's a bit of a blog war going on right now in the rarefied world of Feminist blogging with certain bloggers (male) pointing out the weakness of the Feminist movement in Canada to other bloggers (female).

Sigh. I used to get into some whopping fights with men at the NDP when I worked there because men on the Left are often assumed to be Feminists when what they really are is men on the Left.

And sometimes even that assumption isn't safe because what they really are is just at work collecting a pay cheque because they know a good gig when they land one. Sometimes, too, they're just sort of contrary and like the idea of not being Conservatives or Liberals so they work at/for the NDP. Occasionally, they will come out as not really Left at all, quite Right, in fact. I dated a guy like that - he was the Press Secretary, and although he talked a very Rightwing game (mostly for purposes of mockery), he was dating me and, although I didn't say anything during our relationship (too embarrassed - it was the mid-80s), I am very definitely a Feminist.

Also, and this was a big point in his favour (one I didn't take advantage of because I can't take advantage of advantages on account of I'm one of THOSE Feminists), unlike some men on the Left, who are Dutch Treaters (Labour guys, to a man), he recognized that making at least twice as much money as me (with half the education, skills, etc - but like I say, politics is deceptive), meant that he should cover more of the bill.

Sadly, or happily, depending on your point of view, if there's one thing my Mother taught me (which I forgot for a dozen years or so while I stayed home with children instead of working to earn a pay cheque) it is to always pay your own way and never depend on a man for money. (And she meant it literally, too, because her husband died leaving her a widowed mother-at-home with four young children. She also led a life completely different than her contemporaries because she made all her own decisions, but that's a whole other lesson.)

So it's all very deceptive, who's a Feminist and who isn't, but one interesting discovery I've made over the years is, being a Feminist means never having to say you're sorry. That's because, being a Feminist - and ladies? "only women bleed" - means men don't really like you anyway (so fuck you, pal) and why say sorry to another woman? If she's not a Feminist - fuck 'er, and if she is - suck it up. Or as my Mother used to say to us regularly and regardless of what calamity had befallen us, "Excuse me? Did somebody tell you life was going to be a bowl of cherries (bed of roses, walk in the park, picnic and so on and so forth and more of the same etc etc)?" To which we'd answer cautiously, "No?", because once one of my "smartass" siblings answered, "Yes?", and you don't want to know what happened to him.

Because that's the thing, isn't it. Feminism is a political fight for women's equality with men, so although we've got to play within the system - and we do, but more on that later - there's little point in aligning with any of the existing political parties because it only gives them a credibility they don't deserve.

Politics is backroom boys and male leaders and women are just filler and feel good and look at all our women and what the hell is she wearing and that's a fact, Jack.

Also, politicians want to be liked so that people will vote for them - they just aren't going to go too far out on a limb for Feminism because 1) nobody likes Feminists and 2) Feminism isn't their priority. In fact, I'm pretty sure it falls somewhere short of getting their Christmas cards out on time. It falls definitely short of being the first to sport a poppy.

So, although Feminists need to work within the political system, politics doesn't really work for Feminists in the traditional sense because the traditional sense of politics is all about men, for men, by men. It's a little like how politics doesn't really work for Anarchists and Libertarians, either - except the opposite. That's because Anarchists and/or Libertarians = Male. Very male. Way too male. Give me liberty or give me death? Uh... that's okay. As a woman, I can adapt fairly easily to oppression and subjugation, thanks. And since I'm going to burn in hell for all eternity when I die, anyway (for being a woman, of course), I'd like to live as long as possible - even if it means as a second-class non-citizen, as opposed to just a second-class citizen which I'm used to, quite frankly.

Women don't fare well in Anarchy. No, no, no. We're stuck between a rock and a hard place because we actually need this same political system that works against us, to work within, just to achieve a sensible system for everybody, a sensible system which is based on a level playing field. And creating a level playing field means making the world over in OUR image - female. Like they say, the pendulum has to swing clear over to the other side to land somewhere in the middle and since we don't want middle, it has to swing pretty far from brawn to hopefully rest somewhere a helluva lot closer to brain than the middle - if you catch my drift (think War on Terror/Bush Inc/Conservatives taken over by Reformers/Bill C-484/Fox/CanWest).

So it's going to take a long time to get closer to the brain end of the line. A long time. And, although we should use the political system to make gains, it's a mistake to think we can depend on any one political party to help us. Look at the political parties in this country. They're all led by men, dominated by men, and although men can be Feminists, well, they just don't care as much about our Rights as we do. Or, at all, maybe. There's really no way to trust them on this one, ladies.

Think of it this way, while behind every Feminist there may be a good man, it's important to know that he's not that into you - as a Feminist. He probably just likes the view when you bend over. Especially if you have a great ass.

So yeah, arguing with men on the Internet about Feminism, ladies? Good one. Now get a grip. What was it Nellie McClung said before everybody decided she had to be held to a standard no man from the same period has ever been held to? "Never retract, never explain, never apologize; get things done and let them howl."

And Feminism, because it's women's work, is never done.