Saving Hillary
Okay. Now that it looks like Obama's going to get the Democratic nomination, in spite of the fact that white Americans are now quite comfortable openly expressing their racism (as if it's the same thing as black resentment of white power, and not just revRend Wright - who's probably on crack - doing black power chuRch seRmons) and will not vote for him in numbers sufficient to beat McCain, Hillary needs to do for her country what Carrot Top should do for his career - if Sooey was his manager:
That's right. I'm talking about doing her next speech in blackface. Just send it up, girl. That L'il Obama thinks he can pull off a speech on race that has him compared, by the Democrats for Obama half of the media, to Thomas Jefferson?! You get out that shoe polish and you make that speech for gender equality and you show America the Beautiful who's got the real stones to be President.
Bearing in mind, of course, that even Thomas Jefferson wasn't Thomas Jefferson, if you catch my drift, but a fun house mirror held up to American society never hurt anyone's career, now did it. Well, not counting the time Ted Danson showed up to a Whoopi Goldberg roast in blackface - but hey - she thought it was hilarious. And, I'm sure, at the very least, Bill will, too.
Look, now is no time to be a lady, especially a white lady Democrat running for the presidential nomination.
Oh, and don't forget the hair. I'd go with orange dreadlocks. But that's me, always with the subtle homage to Carrot Top. But do it up big so America gets the joke. Now is the time to pull out all the stops and go for broke, Hillary. Take it all the way or go down swinging those dreads.
