Omigawd, I Almost Forgot
Fuck Canada Day!
Haha! Just kidding - I'm white. So don't put me on a no-fly list, please, Big Canadian Brother Government. Although, I guess you can read my personal email, since it mostly says, "get me a job you useless tit dumbass incompetent corrupt bunch o' fuckfaces!" But speaking of fucking Canada Day, isn't that what Dominionists and Monarch Leagueists and crazy old Yankee lovin' Conservatives say every year? And don't they pretty much live the Fuck Canada Day lifestyle? I mean, isn't hanging out a Union Jack or an American flag a bigger Fuck U Canada than Fuck Canada Day? And isn't sitting in maudlin reverie about the good ol' days of British rule or armchair warrioring the modern days of American raping and pillaging also a Fuck Canada Day every day kind of existence? Cripes, isn't signing Free Trade deals and agreeing to Security and Prosperity partnerships the biggest possible Fuck Canada Day imaginable? Especially since the country we've signed both with routinely breaks its word and has no moral difficulty in invading sovereign countries resulting in the indiscriminate killing of foreign civilians, setting up torture prisons in contravention of the Geneva Convention, and executing its own citizens - all the while invoking a Christian God as its rationale. I mean, c'mon - who's kidding whom here.
Oh wait, those ol' Fuck Canada Dayers are white, too. Nevermind.
