Saturday August 01 , 2015

May Day May Day May Day

No seriously, is there anything Elizabeth May can’t make all about her?

Ferchrissakes, the NDP – finally – comes to and realizes that a debate without Stephen Harper in it has all the disadvantages of a debate, but none of the advantages.

But what does Ms May think of it?

“It’s Conservative-NDP collusion once again to keep the Greens out of the debates and I’m really disappointed.”

At least we can stop pretending Elizabeth May isn’t just a spoiler.



Ok ok Ezra – Show Us YOUR Tits!


Oh Boy

Rusty nailed.


Don’t Worry, Be Harpy

The polls looking as they do, well, I want to assure my Conservative fans that their party of choice will no doubt negative advertise 30-40% of Canadians into positive support and then cheat to win again anyway.

Against doctor’s orders I checked Rebel TV, but it seems to be just a lot of re-reported news items minus the actual news part (i.e. any pertinent details that might get in the way of requested donations to the Rebel TV cookie jar).

And they want money, not cookies. I’m just not clear on how they’re rebels, since they seem more like establishment ass-kissers in total agreement with governing CPC politicians. I mean, as much as Stephen Harper’s hairline denies it, the CPC has been the government of Canada for almost a decade.

Sorry eh, Rebellers. Carry on. As you were. There’s plenty of room for pointless blather. (See Sooey Says)

Just kidding about doctor’s orders back there, too. At my mom’s 90th, my cousin the doctor told me to stay away from doctors, which I was doing anyway. Although now that I post this I think I’ll make an appointment. It’s been over three years and I’ll kick myself if something’s wrong that will kill me now because I didn’t go to the doctor in time to get it diagnosed.

Ugh. Should, should, should. It’s as if our oppression will only end in death.

The other day I was reminded of how it used to be when a friend talked about waiting all day in emergency with a broken arm – back in the ’70s.

I’ve developed a major problem with my jaw. It’s from clenching it in my sleep so I can grind my teeth into smithereens. My dentist warned me this would happen a few years ago, but the fix seemed crazily invasive and expensive (breaking my jaw and realigning it) so I stopped going to the dentist.

Now I’m afraid to go because she’ll be all “I told you so” and charge me quadruple like they do when they’re not out shooting protected endangered species. Also, I’m a part-time minimum wage retail clerk now (so not an unemployment statistic, CBC!), not a government policy analyst, so I don’t have any dental coverage. Not that I’d go through the recommended fix anyway. I’ll live with it for the 30 or 40 years I probably have left. Besides, I’m very good at self-healing by tossing pennies into pools and making wishes. Try it. It works. Also calming my mind before sleep by reminding myself that I have nothing “actual” to worry about.

Oh my god, except those damned champagne socialists Rebel TV was going on about the other day when I foolishly clicked on a Facebook link.

Oh wait, champagne socialists are just rich guys and gals who want to spread their good fortune around by paying higher taxes that fund social programs.

Yay, I don’t even have to worry about champagne socialists!

Also, even if Stephen Harper cheats to win again he’s going to have a hard time getting public money from us to transfer over to the corporate hoarders of the world because more and more of us don’t make enough money to pay income tax.

Haha, guess the joke’s on you now, Conservatives!



Okay, People – It’s time: Eat the Rich!

The British government is reviewing whether obese citizens and citizens with drug and alcohol addiction should be eligible for social assistance if they don’t accept government provided treatment for their moral failings.

That last part is mine, of course, the moral failings part.

The purported goal of this bit of finger-pointing at the weakest link on the island is to solve the problem of their worklessness.

That last part is not mine, it’s theirs.

Smash the state.



Today in Earthonomics

Dear Media,

Not only are we in a recession, but it’s deliberate. Ideologically inspired. Permanent. And the government cupboard is bare because that’s what Conservatives are all about, transferring as much public wealth over to private pockets as they can.

They told us that, remember? I mean, they didn’t use those exact words, but they’d hardly get elected if they did. So they said stuff like they were going to run government like a business, cut corporate tax, reduce public services, and so on and so forth and more of the same etc etc.

And lots of wealthy Canadians will continue to vote for them, regardless of all their nutbarriness about God and homosexuality and abortion, because people with money are insulated from the economic reality facing the rest of us, which is that ways to make money are few and people who need money are many.

It’s not that they don’t care about people without money (and who have no way to make it now) it’s just that… no wait… they don’t care about people without money.

And that’s only understandable. Why would people with money care about people without money in a country that reveres people with money so much that it insulates them from having to care about anyone or anything except their personal stash?

The above is why people without money should down tools and eat people with money. Just desserts! Is it only me, myself and I who remember the wealthy Demarais boy lecturing people without money about how we had to be more productive so that people with money could have even more? I mean, he didn’t put it exactly like that, but it’s what he meant.

Andre? Yes, Andre, son of Paul. He of the more or less state funeral a year or two ago.

Of course, we’ll never convince the sister and brother travelers of Conservatives that this is the case, that we’re tools of the wealthy to make them wealthier, and even if we did, they wouldn’t care. They’re true believers. God will provide. Or He won’t. It doesn’t matter because Heaven. Also, Canadians are raised to believe that if you have money it’s because you deserve it, but if you don’t have money it’s because you’re either morally unfit for decent society or morally superior to it.

And like I pointed out right here on this blog a few years ago, and again and again, the Conservative Party has been playing the long game on recriminalizing abortion by arbitrarily changing the process for appointing federal judges and stacking the courts with pro-lifers. But then a Conservative politician would introduce a bill in the actual House of Commons that didn’t recriminalize abortion, exactly, but distracted everybody into debating whether or not the Conservatives were trying to re-open the abortion debate.

Meanwhile, out in the real world, they were changing our process for appointing federal judges and stacking our courts with pro-lifers.

By the way, Conservatives know that climate change is real and that it’s man-made, they’re just pretending not to believe in either because they’re a wealthy death cult that doesn’t care about anybody or anything, especially the here and now of life on Earth for people without money or any way of making it now that they’re done running government like a business.

Politics 101: Government is public service

Economics 101: Business is private profit

You’re welcome!


Too Soon! Too Soon!

Okay, everybody, stop losing your shit over a poll that claims Conservatives are up in popularity after scattering around a cool $3B in taxable public revenue (hey they found that missing $3B!) to parents of children under eighteen, and save it for election day when there is massive chaos at the real life polls and thousands of Canadians, maybe even you, are disenfranchised.



The Barbeque Circuit Just Got Real

Read the other day that the NDP needs to have a finance minister at the ready who’s acceptable to corporate Canada.

At first I thought, what corporate Canada? Aren’t we pretty much run by multi-nationals now?

At second I thought, no, the NDP needs to have a finance minister at the ready who scares the living crap out of corporate CEOs no matter where they live.

Apparently, the money they’re hoarding could pay off all our debts in one fell swoop.

But also just for the fun of it. Nationalize the banks, 100% inheritance tax, shit or get off the pot.

Corporate CEOs ain’t got no reason to liiive.

Anyway, Stephen Harper and Christy Clark showed up together to assure us that they’ll put out those fires burning up our natural resources out west and Stephen Harper and Brad Wall showed up together to assure us that they want to abolish the Senate.

Opportunity lost much? I mean, we’ve got fires out west threatening to burn until October and a whole arm of government just, you know, sitting there waiting to be abolished…

Cripes, death penalty all ’round much, Sooey?

Uh oh, a new poll shows the Conservatives are in the lead again. Haha – guess they just have to hand out $3 billion in cheques every week until E-day, ramp up the cheat machine, and it’s Prime Minister Stephen J Harper again!



Hey again. It’s a double work day today. Book and that thing I do for money.

Did I come up with that? Retailization?

Anyway, whether I did or didn’t, it seems to be what’s going on, the retailization of employment.

Also, it’s like we’re none of us worth it to each other, financially, that investing where we live has gone the way of the dodo bird.

Years ago, I remember reading an article about downsizing, that it’s a sign of failure when a corporation starts cutting back on human resources.

It was like a light bulb went on – of course it it! How could it not be? And yet cutting back, the fat as we’re called, is where it’s at now. All the rage. Leaner and meaner but with happiness mascots at the office meetings.

And, you know, it can be more fun for the people who are left, or it can be less fun, but it’s hardly growth, is it.

“Grow your business – by shrinking it!”

What’s hard to come to terms with, at first, when you’re on the other side of the counter and working in retail, isn’t just the inevitability of failure, and imminent failure, too, it’s that failure seems to be the whole point.





I missed you, so I decided to come back. I’ve completed the first three chapters of “My Book! My Book! Won’t Everybody Please Think of My Book!” with lots of orphaned chunks for later chapters.

I’m kind of a morning person so I work on it mostly at night.

It didn’t make any difference to my book writing schedule, not blogging. I fritter away the day in other ways. It seems to be how I live my life, frittering. But I’m trying to be more open-minded about it, less Judge Judy.

On the other hand I finally learned to follow the advice of those who have gone before me and instead of deleting several anecdotes that were getting in the way of writing this book, I put them in a folder called “anecdotes for next book”.

I’ve become very literal.

Now I have most of a book I’m not even writing!

We live in luxuriously hectoring times, don’t we? Do more, do less, live this way, live that way.

The other day I read that mindfulness is a corporate scam to trick us into being more productive. I was relieved because I didn’t want to have to learn how to be mindful and yet it’s everywhere, isn’t it, this big finger wagging at me, “You’re not living right!”

Oh yeah? Well actually I’m living my life all wrong on purpose because I’m conducting a very important experiment that will prove, once and for all, that math equals physics. So there.

I don’t know if we’re in a recession or not but I sure hope we are.

By the way, did you read about the big union breakthrough in Toronto retail yet? Unifor negotiated a guarantee of 15 hrs/wk for part-time Metro employees and 5 days notice for their work schedules.

I shit you not.

Trinkets all ’round! Well done! Take that 1950s!

One of Metro’s full-time employees thought Unifor focused a bit heavily on the part-time stuff, but since full-time employees represent just 20% of workers at Metro, she decided she may as well feel “absolutely fabulous” about the deal for the other 80%.

I want to get her a smock for work that has a sarcastic emoticon appliqued on it now.

A co-worker and I got punished recently for being friends with an assistant manager who wouldn’t quit when the store manager decided she should. Our shifts were cut to 1 or 2 per week. And it was funny because I was thinking if that had happened in the public sector I could have called the union.

Then I remembered that when I was laid off, which wasn’t an official layoff because I was on a term, and they just let it run out instead of renewing it, I did call the union. But the head honcho on the other end said, “Listen honey, I got bigger fish to fry.”

Oh well, I was just going through the motions, anyway. I didn’t really care about getting laid off. Of course, I didn’t realize at the time that I’d never make money again, either. Not that it would have made any difference, I suppose.

The second highest salary of my life was the employment insurance I collected after I was laid off.

The most popular course in the public service is the course on retirement planning.

And yet, I have never felt as free to be me as I do right here, right now.

I wish you were here.

Oh. Sorry. My brain just cut over to the store’s music loop there for a second.

There have been lots of articles in the Ottawa Citizen lately about public service executives feeling demoralized because they’re not treated like real executives – except for receiving bonuses on top of their generous salary/benefit packages for laying off other citizens lower down the salary/benefit package scale.

So I ask myself, in this downsized life I’m frittering away quite contentedly, who cares if we’re in a recession?