I had my annual check-up with the bank yesterday evening and I just thought I’d let you, my faithful reader(s), know that everything looks fine – in spite of the Harper Regime – and that the bank is doing well.

Maybe we should demand to see a copy of Stephen Harper’s university transcript.

Then, if it really does show he has a degree in economics, we should become an unruly mob and burn down all our universities.

That’s right, I’m reading “How the Scots Invented the Modern World”. More to come on that when I have more time. Meanwhile, don’t go bragging around town if you’re of Scottish descent. Seriously. Don’t.

Whoo-hoo – February 1st, 2012. I made it. Now, to stay here while my money makes no interest and my employment ends and my government destroys the social safety net because it hates Liberals.

Thanks, Canadian media, for protecting us from the truth until it was too late.

You know it must be something else.

And, of course, it is something else. In fact, it’s not a something, it’s a someone. And it’s not someone we can’t control, either, because it’s politicians working for capitalists from inside governments that are to blame for messing up the economies of the world.

That’s what happens when people elect politicians to government who don’t want to govern, they end up with politicians doing private business with public money until it’s all gone.

You’re welcome, Davos. You may now go back to raping and pillaging the economies of the world with the help of your friends in government.

Once upon a time, there was an independent girl, with healthy self esteem, who exercised prudent judgement in her choice of male companions.

And they all lived happily ever after.

The end.

What is it about so many governments these days that they’re all about cutting out the good things in life, the stuff we got right. Like looking after each other collectively, as a society, so that no one person is beholden to some other person (charity sucks – admit it, philanthropists ). And trying to make it so that people don’t freeze or starve or get so low that they hang themselves from the rafters because it’s cold and there’s nothing to eat (and they’ve already read the Bible upside down 200 times). And then adding in public healthcare, public education, public information centers (politically correct word for the so yesterday word once spoken “libraries”, fogeys) and a public broadcaster of the news of the day gathered by our fellow citizens in a few designated hotspots (places where regimes don’t care about the public good) that is paid for by all of us (but which provides jobs to Sun Media Pundits) – for double plus good all ’round.

What is it that attracts them so much more to a stupid and wrong way of living that has all of us in the financial middle (we’re not going to win free money by spinning a wheel – i.e. wheeling and dealing – but we’re still healthy, educated, employed, and up to date on current events), not only less financially secure than we were just a few moments ago (and definitely a few moments ago, so, the trend continues) – thanks to their ass backward idea of double plus good – but also expecting them to get us all blown-up so they can get to heaven.

Faster… if you catch my drift… even though… if heaven really is… it’s an eternity… which means that you really don’t have to hurry to get more time there.

Downside of capitalism: Spam

Red tape: Regulated spam

Therefore, cutting red tape equals more unregulated spam.

It’s basic economics.

And, yet, who is Canada’s most famous economist?

That’s right, stupids – the one “we” elected Prime Minister!

Gee, maybe the Harper Regime is keen to do business with China because the communist dictatorship there has complete state control over the reproductive choices of its female population right down to mandatory abortions, live birth murders and adoptions by foreigners.

Which seems to not work out in favour of female fetuses and babies, if the dearth of same is any indication of the impact this genocidal approach to population control has had on the real live people forced to live under it.

Head’s up, my sister Canadians. The Harper Regime is selling out Canada, and generations of men and women who fought a lot of battles against the state to expand human rights from a privileged few to the newest comer,  to a small posse of executioners who don’t appear to believe in human rights at all.

And Marci McDonald’s book, The Armageddon Factor, aside – it appears to be doing it for the temporal goal of cold hard cash.

One can hope, at least.

By the way, what’s wrong with preserving our beautiful country rich in natural resources as a giant park, as Stephen Harper so sneeringly puts it. After all, it would make perfect sense to pay Brazil to preserve the rain forest and unhook the rest of the world from coffee, a drug with the worst withdrawal symptoms most of us have ever experienced. What’s the point of being a developed country if the Harper Regime is going to take us back to “there but for the digging, go we”? And Japanese tourists certainly seem to appreciate us for our natural good looks. Beauty sells, Harper Regime – and it’s in increasing demand as the world gets uglier and uglier, a lot of that uglification thanks to us, by the way.

Ooh – exporting uglification – pass it on.

At this point, would it even matter if the Harper Regime is more or less on the take via post politics jahbs!jahbs!jahbs! promises on the boards of multinational oil and gas corporations? Cripes, remember Richard Fadden, Director of our Canadian Security Intelligence Service? He’s been warning us, alarming us, threatening us about politicians being under the influence of Chinese spies for years now. I guess he didn’t get the memo.

I mean, really – who is this one dimensional direction in foreign policy supposed to benefit, if not foreign interests that don’t care about the human rights of their own population, let alone those of Canadian girls and women.

China has a real and well documented birth imbalance because of a systemic policy of extermination of female persons. We have live footage of the massacre of democracy activists in Tiananmen Square. Even Saudi Arabia goes to the trouble of trumping up charges against women so they can be stoned to death by its misogynistic regime.

We can only hope this is all just about money, the Harper Regime’s sudden embrace of China.

Whither the mythical Christianity, though, eh? How long are we going to allow Stephen Harper to pretend he’s a True Believer in anything other than cold hard cash? C’mon, Canada, do the math.

This will be a recurring feature here at Sooey Says.

During the interview, don’t act like Gil from the Simpsons (if the job is in sales) because nobody wants to work around the smell of flop sweat.

If you’re the former captain of a cruise ship who caused a horrific accident and then abandoned ship while there were still passengers on board, including children, there are plenty of possibilities in reality television.

Bonus, you can just be yourself in the interview.

Three words, “China China China”.

I mean, really, all you have to do to find out everything about Canada anyway is sign up at a temp agency in Ottawa and get a job as a file clerk.

Learn French first, of course. And make sure you learn it in Russia because it’s really hard to learn once you’re over here, especially of you work for the Canadian government.

By the way, no one cares if the KGB gave you fake science degrees from our Royal University of Canada. Science is totally over in the Canadian government.

Capiche? No scientists-eh, no problemos-eh, and more mon-eh for mom-eh.

But seriously, we’re doing business with China now, anyway. Not that Russia was ever in the running. I mean, from what I hear, Russia can’t even get it up in space anymore.

But China can. We’ll probably get a contract for a military space station or sumpin’.

Also, China has hacked into all our databases anyway, so, yeah, it makes sense.

Hey, stupids, he’s faking being a Christian. The sweater sets, the aw shucks delivery, the crazy wife who lived with an abortion doctor 40 years her senior. He’s doing the Ronald Reagan.

Geez Louise. Good thing Ol’ Sooey is here to spot a professional for y’all.